Hi all! As I'm sure those of you with the patience to sit through the end credits know, the show is edited and produced by Kyle Sisk. Kyle is the glue holding this podcast together, taking the loose collection of pocket lint that makes up the brains of the two hosts and stitching it together into a beautiful audio tapestry. Without Kyle there truly would be no show. How do we know this? Because this week, we had no Kyle. Kyle came down with COVID and this man STILL tried to get an episode cut together in time for our regular upload. Ultimately we decided his recovery is more important than an arbitrary deadline for a silly show where we're probably going to be talking about dogs made of spaghetti or something, and so this week will be another of our old favorites. Please enjoy!

Hey all! This week, we're rebroadcasting a very memorable TAPE episode from last June to give ourselves a bit of a break: Julian's flight school classes started up again in full force and Trace is traveling back and forth to Brazil to visit his partner while they're undergoing their IVF journey. Don't you fret, though, because this episode contains ⚡️SHOCKING⚡️ and 🪽SOARING🪽 content! Trace tries to inhale a lethal dose of ozone from a bunch of sweaters and Julian finally receives free rein to talk about aviation as much as he wants... but not in the way you'd expect. Thanks for tuning in, and see you next week with a brand new episode!

In this episode, we learn that Julian will never be employed as a telegraph operator, but he might have a future as a Soviet janitor named Ivan who works at a nuclear research facility and collects spicy dead pigeons in his spare time. It's OK, the CIA left them for him, he's not weird. Meanwhile, Trace discovers that the world does not in fact revolve around himself… or anyone else, for that matter. If it did, Everyone Dies™ one way or another.

This week, Trace takes a closer look at one of the boldest maneuvers in pirate cinema: whether a determined crowd could actually flip something the size of an aircraft carrier by running from one side to the other like in the documentary “Pirates of the Caribbean.” Meanwhile, Julian investigates the logistics of purchasing the Sun—who exactly you’d pay for it, what ownership might legally mean, and how tempting it would be to start charging the planet a small recurring fee for access to daylight.

This week on the most serious, most dramatic podcast ever recorded, Trace finally takes Archimedes up on his little boast: “Give me a lever and I can move the world.” Bold claim from a man who’s never seen a 1999 Toyota Corolla. Meanwhile, Julian enters the stickiest thought experiment imaginable—yep, even stickier than trying to eat a spoonful of peanut butter with absolutely nothing to wash it down.